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Saturday, May 12th, 2012
12:25 - Motherfucking hell yeah
I'm getting married in four point six hours, lollerskates.

And I have vivo, neiners, roanpony, and Connie playing Star Wars RPG downstairs. (Well, I think Connie is just sitting beside them doing wedding shit while they do Star Wars RPG.) Kat is busily arranging the Morrowind theme song for the violin for the dudes' walk-down music, and also Concerning Hobbits for the recessional, while Burdock sleeps in a sling.

And joozikafoo ran out to get a sweatshirt or something, and we lost ahsavka and Syekunda somewhere, but they're on the way too.

Also if I don't finish writing my vows onto paper soon I will be reading them off my phone.

AND RAIN, YOU BEST BEHAVE NOW, OR I'MMA COME AFTER YOU, run and tell that.

Let's do this thang, y'all.

(5.4 climbing grade)

Saturday, June 11th, 2011
00:26 - Sculpey Experiment #1
I wanted to sculpt some dragons, but dragons have wings and horns and scales and complicated thin poky bits all over. So, instead, I decided: dinosaurs. They are basically dragons, anyway, only with less of the complicated bits. Until I get around to making a stego, at least.

And the first one came out okayish, after some obsessively slow baking. I probably took it out of the oven a half dozen times; I was afraid it'd burn up and explode, but other than some cracking on the legs, it is mostly intact. She is a Tianyulong confuciusi, only without the proto-feathers, because those qualify as the aforementioned complicated thin poky bits that I was trying to avoid.



The side it was laying on while baking got flattened out, unfortunately. Note the iron marks on the hind-leg, face, and shoulder.



I am not displeased with how it came out, but I think what I mostly learned from making her was a list of what-not-to-do's when sculpting animals. Namely, don't try to make it all from one giant chunk of sculpey from the start. Also I still have no idea how to make realistic wrinkles, those are frickin' hard, man. I think that I know how to make the face look less like a smiley cartoon, though.

(5.3 climbing grade)

Saturday, May 7th, 2011
01:08 - If the hand is moving, it's fair game.
This is what happens when I try to play computer games.



From cuddling in your lap to wrist vampire in .2 seconds flat.

(5.4 climbing grade)

Thursday, May 5th, 2011
20:04 - Me and Xie are no longer dating.
Since I guess a lot of my LJ buddies would've missed the whole Facebook status-update thing, I thought I'd mention here too that me and Xie are engaged now. The editors for Escape Pod are awesome, and they were kind enough to help me out with the proposal, and had the podcast's founder/retired editor pop the question for me at the end of a podcast episode. Poor Xie thought it was just a normal Escape Pod, he never saw it coming. Once he figured out what was going on though, he said yes. (Hooray!)

Getting engaged turned out to be a very bittersweet time. I called my grandmother that night to give her the news; she laughed and said "Well I'm not surprised," before telling me how happy she was for me, and that I'd picked a good 'un, and that she couldn't wait to talk to my mom to discuss wedding plans.

I ended up being one of the last people in the family to talk to her. The next afternoon, she had a stroke, and never woke up. It was awful and sad and horrible and, and, and just sad. We went to the funeral a few days later, down in Rome, Georgia; it seemed like half the damn town was there to pay their respects. (My grandmother was, more or less, a social force of nature.)

I'm not sure if anyone has ever before been told "Congratulations!" at a funeral funeral as many times as I was. Somehow, Q (my grandma) (her name was Susan, but she was always Q to my sister and I), in the brief time since I'd talked to her, had managed to break the news of the engagement to her bridge buddies and other friends. So while standing in the receiving line after the funeral service, I had probably thirty or forty people I didn't even know come up to me to tell me and Xie congrats. It was hilarious and sad all at once, but hearing from so many people how excited she had been about it made me so, so grateful I'd gotten a chance to tell her.

Xie left the country a few days after that, and now we are in the midst of dealing with immigration bullshit and getting his visa application processed. It is taking forever, and it is very unclear when we'll be done with it all.

So now theoretically there is going to be a wedding or something. Luckily for me, my little sister, my mom, and my best-friend-since-birth are all super excited by the prospect of wedding planning, and they have an email chain which I am not even included on where they can discuss all things weddingish.

It turns out that, in order to have a wedding that is not traditional and boring, you have to actually plan it yourself, or at least be heavily involved in the process. I mostly prefer not to, so I will let them see what they can come up with and just hope they do not include too many flowers or lacey things or ridiculous table pieces.

This is assuming I don't get so impatient and fed up with the wait that I don't just make Xie go to a courthouse with me somewhere as soon as his paperwork comes through.

There will probably be a wedding though. Mostly because I seem to have little choice in the matter. Also because I like parties, and "weddings are a pain in the ass" does not seem quite sufficient of a reason to forgo a party that I get to make all of my friends attend. (I have received unbreakable assurances that I will be permitted to choose what kind of beer kegs will be at the wedding.)

As far as the wedding stuff goes, a lot of my ATL friends are mostly just excited about the impending T-Rex Flower Girl. This is because, when I was 16 or 17, I was pretty damned confident I'd never get married -- it is just not my sort of thing. I was so confident, in fact, that when my friend Boman suggested, if I was so damned sure it'd never happen, that I should agree to let him be my flower girl in a t-rex costume if I ever did get married, I had no problem agreeing. So we went to the trouble of writing out a contract: "If Susan ever gets married, Boman will be her flower girl in a T-Rex costume." Both of us signed it.

Somewhat predictably, despite all the dumb shit we did back then that we don't remember now, the t-rex contract was something my friends never forgot. And now that I've mysteriously found myself actually getting hitched, there is no way they are going to let me (or Boman) back out of it. (Actually I think Boman would be heartbroken if I didn't let him, he seems pretty excited about being a t-rex.)

Anyway, people have mostly been cool and shit about the whole engagement thing. I was actually completely convinced everyone was going to make fun of me for it and give me a hard time, because I arguably deserved it. But it turns out everyone is way classier than I'd probably be, because people have been kind about letting me keep my pride, and not teasing me too much. (Some amount of teasing was unquestionably deserved, to be fair.)

But more than anything, I am just really, really excited that Xie and I are not going to be 10,000 miles apart forever. Just gotta put up with it for a little bit damned longer.

(5.5 climbing grade)

Saturday, March 19th, 2011
15:22 - MyneKhrapht?
I am lame and got a MineCraft server. Don't judge me, it was the only way me and Xie could play together, okay?

But since I have the damn thing, it might as well get used. If any of y'all play and want to jump on, lemme know what your username is and I'll whitelist you. The server address is: 72.51.37.212:27365.

(5.9 climbing grade)

Friday, December 3rd, 2010
19:14 - To quote Brockwell, "Brandy! Rawrrawrawrawrgh."
Last weekend, we got a bath robe for Ragnarok.









Because every kitten needs some fashionable lounging-wear. What with all the lounging they do and all.

(5.2 climbing grade)

Monday, October 11th, 2010
21:30 - Ragnarok, All Growned Ups
I already posted this on my for-serious blog, but since most of y'all don't read that, here is a follow-up to the previous video I had up a few months ago of kitten!Ragnarok doing tricks. Back then, he had about four tricks he could do reliably and instantly on command. Now he has about 15, depending on what you count to be a separate trick and not just a variation on a theme. Also, nifty ideas for future tricks are always welcome!



I'm not sure if he's fully grown or not (Google tells me he could possibly keep growing until he is 4 years old, egads) but he's pretty Adultish now. He has, thank god, chilled out a fraction of a bit as he's gotten older, and although he is still pretty aggravating, he no longer so frustrating that he threatens my sanity.

He still wakes me up every morning by scratching on the windows, though. I fracking hate him.

(5.2 climbing grade)

Monday, September 20th, 2010
22:48 - Ultimation
I joined an Ultimate Frisbee team.

I am very out of shape and not very good. I can throw and catch a frisbee in an adequate fashion (although any half-decent border collie would put me to shame) but I spend most of the time running in circles and trying not to get in other people's way. It is pretty fun, though. We had our first game on Sunday, and here are two photos from it. They are hilarious, but for completely different reasons.








Also I have my first trial in three days 50 hours. This too is hilarious, although possibly more in the slow moving train wreck kind of way. I'mma do my best to litigate the living heck out of it, though.

It reminds me in a lot of ways of my 1L Mock Trial competition. Only without Manuel there to be eye candy for the judge. And not as disastrous. Hopefully.

(5.3 climbing grade)

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010
23:43 - My poetry, circa 18.
So I was moving some of my stuff around, and found some of my old scribble books I used to keep with random notes and quotes and other nonsensical things in it. I flipped through one dated "2004," and found the following poem I had written in it.

An Ode to Cows

I think I know how a cow feels
When it attempts to wear high heels,
The same way I do.
Moo.

I do not remember the how or the why behind it, but it makes me laugh. And also a bit sad about how 18-year-old-me would feel about 25-year-old-me, when at least twice a week I suck it up and wear high heels to work, or at least to court.
 

(climbing grade)

Saturday, March 6th, 2010
11:38 - Ranger Day! (And Cootha Day, and SinkCat.)
Ranger is a giant sook who is terrified of crossing tiny, tiny streams. (Maybe he was traumatized by playing too much Oregon Trail as a puppy.) So alternative means of fording the river were required. (Apparently I am Ranger's oxen.)




When we were on the beach, Ranger found a bone. He then proceeded to dig a hole and bury it, and we all about died from the adorableness. So I dug it up and made him bury it again while I filmed it.




And this is a short story about a timeless struggle: Man vs. Beast. Guess who loses.





And just because there is now way I can allow that much Ranger without countering with some Ragnarok, here is The Bathroom Stalker:



If you try to go into the bathroom, he will force his way in to follow you. And then sit in the sink and stalk you.

It's even worse if you try to brush your teeth or wash your hands. Because, unlike Ranger, he is not afraid of water, and he will refuse to move, even then.

And because this one made me LOL as I was going through my files to upload the videos.Collapse )

(5.6 climbing grade)

Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010
21:11 - Dinnertime
Xie, handing me a plate: "I call this sandwich the 'Take Your Daughter to Work Day.'"
Me: "Wait, why....?"
Xie: "Because it's a chicken and egg sandwich."
Me: "......"
Xie: "Get it? The grilled chicken is taking the egg... its daughter... to work. Their work is being a sandwich."
Me: "No, I get it! It's just that that's horrible! ... Tastes pretty good, though."

(5.6 climbing grade)

Friday, February 26th, 2010
19:08 - Why Australians Should Not Be Left Unsupervised in America
Yesterday, Xie went shopping while I was at work. He bought some beer. Two kinds of beer, to be precise. Natty Light. ... And a four pack of King Cobra Malt Liquor.

"Look!" He says. "I got some cheap beer... and some nice beer for later!"

I was, to say the least, extremely perplexed as to which was which.

"Err... Do you realize what King Cobra is?" I asked. "Actually, do you even know what malt liquor is?"

"Well, the check out lady did stare at me funny when I bought it," he admitted. "But look -- the label says 'premium' on it! I thought that meant it was a nice beer. ... And also that it was on special. $3.50 for a four pack, for the tall cans."

".... The King Cobra is yours. I'll be drinking the natty light." [Editor's Note: That is a phrase I hope to never have to utter again.]

And so now Xie has to, eventually, get through four King Cobras. I actually did end up trying some of the one we opened. It smells a bit... odd, but it tastes fine. And by fine, I mean the same as water.

(5.7 climbing grade)

Monday, February 22nd, 2010
21:53 - fyi
Ragnarok just lost his first baby tooth! I wonder what the tooth fairy will bring tonight.

(5.3 climbing grade)

Friday, February 5th, 2010
22:38 - SNOWPOCOLYPSE BLIIZZARDKRIEG '10!!!1
Tonight had some serious deficiencies -- chief among them would be Xie being stranded in LA for an unknown duration, instead of being here in D.C. as scheduled -- but it turned out pretty all right after all.

Plus getting to tromp about through a blizzard with a Kitten-on-a-leash is pretty awesome. Kitten <3 snow. And Kitten tolerates the leash, because it means he gets to hunt the snow. Also it is snowman snow, a much welcome variation from the weeks of disappointing dry powder.

I already made one snowball so giant that I am pretty sure it is physically impossible to lift any second snowball that is proportionate to the first up on top of it. So no snowbeings, as of yet. But they'll happen.

(5.1 climbing grade)

Wednesday, January 27th, 2010
19:47 - KITTEN WHIRHIRRLL
SOOoo to make a long story short: Got a job in D.C., yay!, stayed in D.C., yay!, mom and dad got sick of Ragnarok's high-intensity and extreme neediness (i.e., his habit of attacking anything that moves, whenever it moves, and never needing to sleep), so mom drove the kitten up to live with me, yay!

So now I get to inundate y'all with kitten videos.

Unfortunately, due to a series of tragic events, my computer is now the most bojank-ass computer on earth and can only barely handle recording video. The sound is wonky, the speed randomly zooms up, and the quality is, to say the least, poor.

Alas. I wanted to show off Ragnarok's jumping ability -- it's not so much a "trick" as it is hilariously awesome. He knows the command for "jump here," so now I can make him jump farther and farther until he's doing ridiculously long jumps between crates. But the video camera is not quick enough to show him in midair, so he just kind of blurvitates around. (Webster's Dictionary defines "blurvitate" as "to levitate oneself in a blurry manner.")

So for now, this little snippet is the best I can do. Better luck next time. But here's him doing three of his tricks, at least!




Ragnarok's Tricks Illusions
Prairie Dog: One finger pointed straight at the air. He stands on his hind legs.
Earthworm: An "ok" sign pointed downwards. Kitten lays down, out with his paws poking out in front of him.
KITTEWHRURL: Finger pointed out drawing circles in the air, while yelling some variation of the theme KITTEN WHI-HIRLLL!!!1 Kitten then does a kitten whirl. Only it's more like a kitten amble -- he has thus far resisted any sort of enthusiastic kitten whirling. Rather, his approach is "I will spin in order to get my food, human, but do not expect me to enjoy this."
Bunny-hop: Drawing an arc in the air between the object he is on to the object I want him to jump on. He's allowed to get there however he wants.
Big jump: A fist held over whatever table or object he's supposed to "big jump" to. This means he has to get it in one bound -- no hopping off one table, walking over, and hopping onto the next one.

He has those five tricks down pat, and he's at various stages of progression on a few others. Eventually I'll get someone else to film so I can actually have him jump around and do tricks instead of being stuck just standing on the table.

Also, yeah, I know, I'm probably a little too obsessed with my kitten, shut up.

(5.8 climbing grade)

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009
00:18 - Kitten Learns to Prairie Dog
Tonight, Tuttle, Dooley, and I should have won at trivia. We, the Daft Hyenas (who should've been Dirty Agnes, we later realized), were in first place after the first round, and in second place, by a single point, after the second and final round. This is despite the fact there were only three of us and we made up all the sports and pop culture answers. But then there was a bullshit jeopardy-style final question, and we could not wager any because none of us knew wtf movies were released in 2009. We were robbed.

To make up for the tragic loss, here is another cute kitten video.

Some of my friends were making fun of me and my ridiculous kitten, and they bet me that I could not teach him to stand on his hind feet at the command of "prairie dog."

I do not lose bets. Considering how dumb he is, the kitten was a remarkably quick learner. He does not yet know the trick purely off of a voice command, unfortunately, because I made the mistake of teaching him the trick by pointing at the ceiling. So we're still working on the voice command part.

Anyway, before I went out tonight, I got my dad to film the kitten showing off his stuff.

But please, ignore the fact that my voice sounds like it belongs to a hyperactive eunuch. I AM SORRY, I promise I do not normally sound like that! I only sound like that when talking to tiny kittens. It's like an allergic reaction, only instead of breaking out into hives, I revert to baby talk. GUD KETTUN.



Note that I am not sure this can properly be described as "training." Ragnarok had made it abundantly clear he is not obeying commands. Rather, prairie dogging is something he chooses to do when I am offering something that he wants. (In the video, I used ham, which is guaranteed to get perfect obedience out of him.)

If I try and do the trick while offering little kibbles of his regular food, he will obey if he is hungry. Otherwise he will just ignore me and try to attack my feet.

(5.8 climbing grade)

Tuesday, December 22nd, 2009
15:53 - Ragnarök and Mdogo
When I got back to Atlanta, there were two small fuzzy things waiting for me. Here is Ragnarök Rex, a stray Christmas kitten, and Mdogo, a Christmas yeener.

They quickly became bestest buddies.



Ragnarök's new favorite game is to have someone perch the hyena up on a table or other high ledge, so that he can stalk it, pounce it, knock it off the ledge, and grab it in a throat hold, in what is essentially a reenactment of a lion suffocating a wildebeest. After Mdogo is "dead," Ragnarök purrs and cuddles up with his kill and grooms it.

Based on this behavior, I suspect the kitten may have some emotional issues.







Ragnarök will attack the hyena the moment he sees it, so it was tricky trying to balance the hyena upright, keep the cat distracted long enough to turn the camera on, and then catch the final kill on film. I finally succeeded, except he was so distracted by the keys I was using to divert his attention that he took forever to notice Mdogo, and when he finally did, it was a less-than-impressive attack. His cuteness is still evident, though.



ETA: Travis and I drove back from D.C. together, but he accidentally left one of his med school books in my car when we got in to town last night. He came over this afternoon to pick it up, but to avoid driving home in the ATL rush hour, he decided to study over at my place while I was working on job apps. So we were sitting at the kitchen table, when Ragnarök crawled up into his lap to sleep. A few minutes later:

Travis: "Uh... not to alarm you, but have you taken the kitten to a vet yet? Is it possible he has some sort of heart condition?"
Me: "Err. Yes he's been to a vet, but no, there was no heart condition I don't think?"
Travis: "Okay. It's just it sounds exactly like he's got a kind of heart arrhythmia that humans get sometimes, sort of mechanical sounding."
Me: "You've never had a pet cat have you?"
Travis: "Well, no..."
Me: "That's called purring."

(5.4 climbing grade)

Sunday, December 20th, 2009
17:50 - The Great Snowwall of D.C.
As you may have seen in the news, SNOW.

The official amount was two feet, I think, but in the courtyard behind my apartment, the drifts were easily three feet high. Which is hilarious to watch a four foot tall kid walk through.

The snow was crying out to be played in in. All day yesterday, I cajoled friends to come over and make a snowman with me, and none of those assholes would. Only one of them even had the courtesy to lie about "needing to study," the rest just said "um, no."

So this morning I decided I would go out and play in the snow all by my damned self. The snow, sadly, had not gotten melty enough for snowmen, but with all the snow at my disposal, I was determined to make a ginormous snowfort.

About five minutes into it, I heard someone laugh from the walkway above, "Oh look, she's using a law textbook -- best use for those I can think of." They were talking about me, I knew, because I was using my Property Law book as a shovel, as it was the most boring large flat object in my apartment. I looked up and and saw two guys about my age wandering over towards me. "Hey there," one said. "Can we help you with that?"

I was pretty pleased, I'll admit. All right!, I thought. Now I've found someone to play in the snow with me! So I told the dudes something along the lines of, "Sure! You can help if you want. I am building a ginormous snowfort."

The two dudes looked at me funny, and then one said, "Oh, we thought you were trying to clear off your walkway." And then they left. How is it even possible for people to be that boring? They were nice enough to wander over to offer to help a stranger clear her walkway, sure, but then they were suddenly unwilling to move snow around when it turned out the purpose was to build an icy replica of Minas Tirith rather than to simply clear a path.

Luckily, a little while later a trio of kids showed up, and awkwardly started playing football next to me in the snow. It was very obvious that they were eying my snowfort enviously, with the three of them taking turns shuffling closer to it before shying away again. Finally I told them, "You guys can help if you want to, you know," and, boom, three new construction crewmembers were instantly acquired. So I ordered them about on where to place new piles of snow, gave them some instructions in advanced snowball throwing techniques, and, finally, we created a snow-wall that was taller than a fourth grader.



After it was a decent height, I dug a hole through the bottom of it for the kids to play in. And by "the kids" I mean "me." Because the tunnel was fourth-grader-sized and not lawyer-sized, however, I could only barely fit. I had no room to crawl, but I did not want to wriggle my way through for fear of collapsing the fort. Solution: Slide about halfway through head first, then stick out my hands out and tell my construction crew to each grab an arm and pull me the rest of the way. Success!

Later that afternoon, after hearing some kids yipping loudly in laughter for a while outside my window, I looked out again to see that the wall had been demolished. So long as it was my little crewmembers who got to enjoy destroying it, awesome! But if it was some other group of neighborhood kids that did it, those little bastards suck. Luckily, however, before the wall's destruction, my roommate got a photo of it.

(5.6 climbing grade)

Sunday, December 13th, 2009
00:08 - Surfin' Santa
The Australian Embassy is directly in between my place and Dupont Circle, so I walk by it fairly often. Tonight on the way home, I noticed they had their Christmas lights up, and their display is kinda cute. Since I've got a few Australians on my flist, I thought I'd share:

(5.4 climbing grade)

Monday, June 29th, 2009
10:26 - Happy Rhino is Happy.
Photobucket
[Climbing Mt. Cootha With a Chicken]

This is a photo from our adventure up Mt. Cootha. I am the one riding the rhino. You can tell because I am speaking in a font called 'Georgia.' Babs, of course, is the one wearing a zookeeper hat. (Xie took the photo so cannot be in it, obviously.)

The only thing about it that is photoshopped is DJ's horn. It is filed down so he cannot as effectively destroy things, but I photoshopped it to make it as sharp as it is supposed to be.

There are two bite marks on the sword because there was already one, and we were wondering if it was in fact a bite mark. We said it was probably from James, but then Babs remembered that particular sword once resided at the Hexenberg and so could be hers. So she bit it for comparison purposes, and lo, the bites were the same. Verily, Babs is indeed the sword biting culprit.

(5.3 climbing grade)

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